January 11, 2007-
Lucasfilm LTD has announced the recall of "The Phantom Menace", 3/4 of "Attack of the Clones" and several scenes from "Revenge of the Sith", as well as a small number of scenes from the wildly popular "Special Editions" of the original Star Wars films.
Citing possible injury, extreme disappointment and "total loss of interest in the entire franchise" as possible side-effects from consumption of the products, the company is asking anyone who has watched or purchased any of the affected products to return them directly to Skywalker Ranch. The company will be issuing certificates, which will be redeemable for replacement copies once the problems are fixed and the films "are actually watchable, enjoyable AND not a flagrant slap in the face of the beloved original films".
Fan reaction is mixed, but as Rick Mccallum said "Even the fucking nerds who used to think it was THE shit are starting to find flaws in the fucking things- guess they don't know fucking AWESOME when they see it", so it appears the recall will stand despite protests.
In a related story,Star Wars Fanclub president Dustin Roberts has promised to go on a hunger strike until he is chosen to replace Hayden Christiansen and Jake Lloyd in the role of the hero-turned-villain Anakin Skywalker. The hunger strike is expected to last several months, which could be long enough for Roberts to actually lose enough weight to be a long-shot for the role.
