The supervillains you'll NEVER see

[anarky]

The Naked Ninja: An assassin for hire, trained by the greatest criminal masterminds in the world. He is one of the deadliest ninjas on earth. Trouble is, he is also a nudist. Part of the reason he's so successful is that heroes and bodyguards don't really want to fight him.

Percival, the Shit-Flinging Monkey: Genetic engineering bestowed great intelligence, and a good-sized evil streak, in this seemingly normal monkey. His goal is total world domination. He attains his goals with the greatest weapon known to monkey-kind: flung dung. Because not even Superman can withstand a handfull of shit being thrown in his face without crying like a girl.

Molestarr: A hideous creature of unimaginable power, from a far off dimension. Nearly invulnerable, he comes to earth in search of... what? World domination? Total destruction of the universe? No. Worse. He wants to have sex with as many young boys as possible.

[kidhuman]

Harry the Hyena: Spawned with some of the Jokers DNA, he plays tricks and robs bank, all the while laughing at you.

[anarky]

The Eternal Jaywalker: Fate cursed him with eternal life and invulnerability. Bored senseless after several decades, he finally took on the mission of crossing busy streets, runways, train tracks--whatever he could cross and cause massive accidents.

He's a menace because he will never stop. Dozens die every month because of his neverending obsession. And, well, you don't spend very long in jail for jaywalking, so he's usually out in a few hours.

[kidhuman]

Mr. Bone Jangles - Is nothing more than a skeleton. He can pull out bones and throw them at people, the only problem is he falls to pieces if he pulls out too much.

[Eternal Padawan]

I think DC already has Percival, The Shit Flinging Monkey. Except they call him Gorilla Grodd. And if one super-intelligent ape wasn't enough, they also have the "effeminate" ( read: GAY) Monsier Mallah, partner of The Brain. Which is what it soounds like. A Brain in a jar. Goddamn DC has the stupidest fucking villains.

[Ran]

Molestarr sounds like he may be the love child of Bizarro The Grin and Michael Jackson.

[s]Tycho[/s]The Brain Cramp: This villian has the ability to make incredibly stupid statements that paralyze the mind of his victims, allowing him to rob them blind.

[The Grin]

She isn't really a villian, but Eternal Padawan's mother has this amazing super power. She can extract the juices from any man just by using her tongue.

[Eternal Padawan]

If you guys met my mother, you wouldn't say such things.

[jjreason]

You wanna know a supervillain that you'll never see? How about Dr. Doom. Anyone seen him in oh, say.... 3 years or so?

[Eternal Padawan]

You wanna know a supervillain that you'll never see? How about Dr. Doom. Anyone seen him in oh, say.... 3 years or so?

Aside from him trying to steal the hammer of Thor when it landed in that cornfield right before Civil War?

[jjreason]

Oh, Christ.... you got me. That's really not that much though, and the "other" last time I saw him was in that FF One Shot where he was playing chess with Reed - I really thought they were setting up for another good Doom story there.

[Diabolical]

that FF One Shot where he was playing chess with Reed

They played chess? How the hell did I ever miss that one!?

[jjreason]

It was good.... a single FF one shot that came out a few months ago. I believe it was called "All in the Family" or some such horseshit, but I'll check that and get back to you. Very good comic.

[vynsane]

i'm stealing all of these ideas for bug-boy. just fyi.

[Eternal Padawan]

Shit Stealer. Much like a cold fusion system that runs on water, a brilliant scientist discovers a way to create perpetual energy out of methane. Unfortunately, he can only use the freshest turds, so he has to cultivate them directly from people's anuses ( anii?). This puts him at odds with heroes (and everyone with an anus)