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Swedish pop band Ace of Base would like to apologize to the entire world for its past transgressions, founding member Ulafbornghein Berggenborfendoofer told the AP Monday.
"Ve am so young then, ve am trust translator," Berggenborfendoofer said. "'All That She Vants' in Svedish is beautiful tribute to salmon fisherman who give life to help Jew in Holocaust. Ve am not know English translation so bad, cause so many to lose lunch so often."
Belated though it is, Berggenborfendoofer's apology may do wonders for his band's reputation. In 1993, the song was so bad that Iran issued a fatwah on the band members, Japan sentenced the members to commit hara-kiri if they ever set foot in Asia, and Andy Griffith said, "That song just fucking sucks." The nauseating melody of this piece of shit song led French President Ima Weenair to declare nuclear war on Sweden, until he realized that would involve the French people coming out from the basements they'd been hiding in since World War I.